Dream Interpretation

HOLA QUESTERS! It is I, Kelsey, finally posting. Today I will intrepretationing Rachel's nightmare. Trust me. I've had like four psych classes.

To begin, you are outside your home after work because thats one of the few times you are not with other people. Alternately, it could have possibly been morning when Tyler leaves for work first. However, because this was at night your closest alone-time memory is right after work. It is important that you are alone in the dream because you will most likely be alone a lot when the baby is born and Tyler is at work. Wahya isn't there because forshadowing. Your dreams a fucking novel now.

No one trusts a blond hair guy. They are all nazis. Every single one. Its also nice to point out that I imagined him as the complete opposite of Tyler, though I have no idea what he looks like. Was I correct? If so, the point behind that is either a) You just watched the episode and it stuck for no reason or b) you trust tyler completely and anything opposite of him, in your mind, is not worthy of trust yet.

You immediately sprint away without wondering about the situation first, which means you'd survive in horror movies. Just saying.

He said he wanted your guns. What he really meant was your arms. He has an obvious arm fetish and the fact that you didn't notice this immediately means you'll be a terrible mom. Its important for mothers to be able to spot arm fetishes in men.

The lackeys are unenthusiastic because they prefer feet.

The men are obviously stupid because why would they steal guns from a woman in the middle of nowhere and not plan on killing her? OBVIOUSLY the man feels them judging him for his arm fetish and has changed his mind and decided he meant real guns so that he can kill you before you also judge him, you pretty-armed lady you.

He says "We're all in this together" because High School Musical is his favorite movie, as is expected, and now that you definitely know this for sure he HAS to kill you. He quotes the movie whenever appropriate and his lackeys prefer The Cheetah Girls, so they are obviously upset about this. They are on your side because you are harshly judging him with your venomous body language and judgy face thing that you do all the time, especially when you talk to like me for instance.

You give a big speech about leaving because this is the climax of the dream and your dream is a novel and all good climaxes have lots of words. You mention Tyler and the babby because they are always at the forefront of your mind.

Leader-man's lackeys turn on him and do nothing as you stab him because they remember that one time he said that Raven Symone was ugly and they didn't like it. The knife changes to a pair of scissors in this part because you are a lesbian and scissors are important to you. You wanted him to know that you are sexually attracted to Raven Symone, but didn't want to say it in front of the lackeys. They understand the symbolism.

He lunges at you again because a Wild Cat never gives up.

He turns into Wahya, obviously, because you are crazy. Also because if you rushed inside right after work you wouldn't have had time to unlock Wahya and therefor he wouldn't be able to protect you in real life. Dream you was laughing at this irony.

So, theres your dream interpretation, a-la Kelsey. I hope you enjoyed it, and just know its 100% correct. Yup.