Random Quote Time!

My marvelous readers!

Not Rachel's readers, fuck you guys.

MY marvelous readers! Today I will present to you a random quote with absolutely no background context!


"Hitler is to Mustache as Burt Reynolds is to Mustache."

Now lets see that as a helpful chart!

Hitler:Mustache :: Burt Reynolds:Mustache

There you have it, folks.

Douchist thing ever.

So, Rachel and I, it seems lately, have been talking a lot about our high school days. More specifically, our bus riding days.

EVERY. DAY.

Rachel graduated and ABANDONED EVERYONE THAT LOVED HER a year ahead of me. But, unlike most juniors and seniors, we never stopped riding the bus. Why waste gas money? Plus, we had a good time on that bus.

We were like queens of that bus, really. We ruled over all the puny middle schoolers. It kills my soul to know that they are probably all in high school, now, because we've been out of school a very long time. Like, three whole years for her, two for me.

This show was high as we were.

We sat in the very back. Thats obviously where the cool kids sit. And I remember we had like a little group back there of friends. And we were ridiculous. Most of mine and Rachel's inside jokes probably come from there.

Although, according to her, I am not on the cool side and cut over. Skank.

So, thats where that above quote came from. We were most likely high our whole bus riding experience.

Like this.

That Feel, Bro Thursdays - Rachel

First of all, everyone stop your applauding. I know I'm awesome.

Stop it. I mean it.

Second of all, Kelsey's last post about gnomes was hilarious.

She is just jealous that she doesn't have a legitimate fear on me.

Except this:

 I will eat your family mother-fucker...from the inside out. There is nothing you can do about it. Fuck you.

However, I feel this is not a fear she can use on me because no one likes spiders.

Not her. Not you. Not anyone. 

What's that? You say you like spiders. Do you? You're lying.

The only person who likes spiders is Cthulhu...

*Note*: Water is strategically placed to hide his massive, terror-inducing junk.

He eats them for breakfast. 

Anyway, I've gone way off topic. This is a 'That Feel, Bro' post. Let's get to it.

"Do you know that feeling you get when you're driving on the interstate and some asshole starts riding your ass (when you're already going 5-10 over) and they zip around you only to immediately swerve in front of you (so you have to slam on your breaks on the damn interstate) and then they get off at an exit literally two seconds later? And all you want to do is slam them like:

 I eat crazy for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Bro, you feel me?"