RESPONSENOANSFODASDFN

Sherlock is kinda BAMFy, but not as much as John. Thats why the episode with Adler is my fave, because Sherlock shows his hardcore side. Hes not a pussy.

Well.

Okay, sometimes he is, but only because I'm comparing him to John.

I love Rupert Graves' voice! Its not super deep, but its like slightly gravelly and great. Ughughugh. He is kinda funny and sarcastic in this version. Most versions have him being all "ugh I hate sherlock kinda not really but i do" and in this version hes tentatively a friend. Or at least considers himself one. Kinda. Hes super sarcastic though and I love him.


I don't think Liam and Tyler will let you have her, sadly. I also don't know who that is.

Shes a bombshell though!

Nah, you don't gotta watch SPN. I think you'd like Doctor Who though...

It has pretty ladies that are super strong characters...at least until Moffat takes over as show-runner. Thats why the ladies in Sherlock aren't overly strong and developed characters. Moffat is the show-runner. Ugh.

Anyways. Sherlock and Doctor Who. Both British. Both Brilliant. Both you need to watch.

kk byes

Answering Kelsey's Nonsense

Kelsey. Ugh. Don't be crass. It is so unbecoming of a lady.

You say Peenis, fine. Be problematic. I don't care!

I'm not sure why you expect me to take your word that Sherlock is 'amaze-balls'. Do we truly ever agree on shows/movies/anything?

Answer: NO. (Okay. Sometimes.)

Dickier is not a word. However, if you insist.

For real. Not a word.

As for a BAMF Dr. Watson, I can certainly dig that. Is Sherlock full of BAMFness too? Or is he the pussy of the show?

Na na na na na na na na BAMF-man!

I concur with you regarding Lestrade - very hott. But how is the character? The voice? DETAILS MOTHERFUCKER!

Gross with the girl. What do you take me for? Bisexual? Who have you been talking to!?!?! Besides, I can do better.

Not Sherlock, but who cares?

Do you think that Tyler and Liam would let me have her?

I can sum your post up easily. Let me try. Ahem.

MY NAME IS KELSEY AND I LOOOOOVVVVEEE (WITH A CAPITAL EVERYTHING EVER!) SHERLOCK. YUM. YUM. ALL THE ACTORS. I'D BLOW THEM ALL. ALL. OF. THEM. EVEN THE GIMPY ONE (Is there a gimpy one?). AND ESPECIALLY THE CASTING DIRECTOR. RACHEL. WATCH. RACHEL. WATCH. RACHEL. COME TO THE SHERLOCK SIDE OF LIFE. THEN SUPERNATURAL.

Right?

 

Kelsey, for real. I miss you. Why is adult life so adult-like?

Umm

Peenis, not everlark. Peenis. Its funnier, you assbutt.

Also, Sherlock is amazing. Its a modern retelling of the ACD canon. With a dickier Sherlock (similar to House's Sherlock character...but not quite as...dickish. The canon didn't have Sherlock as a dick, just socially awkward sometimes.) And a total BAMF John Watson.

And the hottest fucking Greg Lestrade in the world.This is Rupert Graves, by the way.

Oh, and Laura Pulver as Irene Adler, a dominatrix and surprisingly not a sexist portrayal of one. She is a bamf, as well, and looks good doing it.

She is only in one episode, sadly.

I kinda wanna put a picture of most of the cast. They are all wonderful actors and actresses and I love the casting director for this damn show. Ughhhh. Such. Good. Portrayals.

Although, Moffat isn't my favorite writer, Mark Gatiss is always A+. He plays Mycroft Holmes, is a part of the writing portion, and has also written for Doctor Who. Yesss!

You'll love it. Hopefully. Or at least like it. Sherlock's social awkwardness, bad attitude, surly nature, and slow burn that he thinks he is hiding from John for John is amazingly funny. John Watsons badass everything is perfect. The plot moves well, its suspenseful, and you really get a feel for the characters because of the cast's amazing acting skills.

I am cry.

New Vintage

Well my sweet darlings, since Kelsey insists on me making the announcement....

I proudly announce my son, Liam Alexander, was born on July 17th at 5:42 P.M. He weighed a hefty 9 pounds, 7 ounces and was 21 inches long.

I finally had my follow-up appointment today and was given this tidbit of information: apparently Liam is the heaviest baby their practice has ever delivered.

Sweet.

In other news, I'm practically bursting with excitement regarding the new Hunger Games movie. This may or may not have to do with my insane love over Jennifer Lawrence and Josh Hutcherson. EVERLARK motherfuckers. 

Awww yissss!

In other, other news, Kelsey's blathering over the BBC version of Sherlock Holmes has finally roused my interest. Fucking damn her. However, I honestly know nothing of the show other than these 3 facts:

1) The show may or may not have to do with legit Sherlock Holmes shit.

2) Martin Freeman is an adorable little fuck and I want him to live in my pocket. Hobbits are that small, right? (wrong movie?)

3) Benedict Cumberbatch (seriously, worst name to have as a child) has a voice that I'm pretty sure is composed of equal parts sex and dirty sex. (And no Kelsey, he is still not as awesome as Alan Rickman, though he may try.)

Kelsey, I may be tempted to view this show. But. Not. Supernatural. Never. 

****************

So...jumping along topics like a pro...

Why are car manufacturers intent on making cars have faces? Are they trying to kill me? Because I think they are. Do you know how hard it is to crane your neck on I-81 because you just saw a 2013 Nissan Blah Blah Blah drive by with a grumpy face? Do you!?

Pareidolia is a weird thing my friends. Weird indeed.

That monstrosity is a Chrysler Gem Peapod. It is so fucking happy. So absolutely mind-blowing, just-jizzed-in-my-pants, fucking happy. 

I'M SO HAPPY I COULD 'SPLODE!!!!

Or a Mazda MazdaSpeed3...

I'M SO HAPPY. WHY AM I SO HAPPY?!!!!

Look at this sexy piece of ass. The Mazda Kiyora (I fucking want, btw).

This car seems to say:

HA, HA, YOU'RE FUNNY! NO BUT REALLY, I'LL FUCKING CUT YOU!

Ford Police Interceptors

WHOOP-WHOOP MOTHERFUCKERS, I SEE YOU FUCKING BREAKING THAT SPEED LIMIT. TASTE THE FURY OF MY FUCKING TICKET PROWESS. BAP, $400.00 NOW. FUCK YOU.

***********

And while we're on the subject of cars...

OMFG, I want. I WANT.

This sexy beast is the Mitsuoka Orochi. Why the fuck don't I have this? Why? Oh why!!!

Oh yes, I remember now. Because I'm poor.

Let's be more realistic then. These are 5 cars that I sincerely want (that probably won't break me):

1) Nissan Juke (yes, laugh away)

2) Chevrolet Volt

3) Dodge Charger

4) Mitsubishi Lancer

5) Ford Fusion

And because I can...5 cars that I sincerely want but can't afford:

1) Cadillac CTS-V Coupe

2) Audi R8 V10 Spyder

3) Astin Martin Vanquish

4) Cadillac Elmirage

5) Tesla Roadster

And then a few concepts...still out of my price range:

1) Lamborghini Egoista

2) Lamborghini Ferruchio 

3) Alfa Romeo Pandion

4) Bugatti Aerolithe

But you know what vehicle sucks major balls?

THESE ONES

Much love Kelley. Much love.

I feel a disturbance in the force...

I am the worst person in the world. God. I am horrible.

So, a number of things need to be addressed.

First off, LOMLBFFL is quite possibly the funniest thing I've ever read.


Second off, I fully believe that, in some cosmic untestable way, either Rachel or myself is a robot that has developed an attachment to the human portion of our friendship and that causes an algorithm to create itself to predict what the human half will say.

There is no way to figure out or test which is a robot and which is human.

what ever happened to him?

Please do not test your friends for robotic properties. I may get arrested for that.

Thirdly, Rachel is more busy than I, I just forget things. I am grateful she hasn't let go of this blog, because its a friendly reminder that we have a blog. And thats a nice reminder to be friendly reminded of.

friendship. friendly reminder to friendly remind a friend of something friendly and in need of reminding.

 Fourthly, lord. Okay. So, quick run-down of what I've been up to. I am currently enrolled full time at Old Dominion University, but I attend distance learning classes for my bachelors of psychology, minor in communications. Why do I do this? I do this to go to a local community college, too, so that I may be on the Speech and Debate Team. While I am enrolled there, I am also starting an A Capella group.

Yes, its this.

While I am working on starting a club that, I may mention, I know nothing about and am simply doing all the grunt work, I am also the VP of the Fine and Performing Arts Club, which is a club that encompasses ALL THE OTHER FINE AND PERFORMING ARTS RELATED CLUBS AND I DIDNT KNOW THIS. So, if they want my help, I have to help them. I'm skipping a Leadership Conference I really wanted to go to so that I can throw a Halloween Party. I am cancelling a Tea Party so I can go to a Forensic's Tournament.

Along with ALL THAT, I am also a member of the poetry club. I do not know how thats going to go, yet. I am also teaching the Forensic's class so that our teacher can teach the acting class she has scheduled that time, too, so the drama department won't die out.

Oh, did I mention I am also planning and hosting an Improv Night to support the Forensic's Team? I am doing all the planning, grunt work, postering, advertising, everything.

self explanatory

So, thats a lot. On top of all of that, too, I am writing a book. And, unlike my sci-fi book and the last three short stories I have started writing, I fully plan on finishing this one because I believe in this one. I believe this book may one day be published and I believe that my friends that I have told about it (very few) have preconceived notions of it, but I have changed the course and the characters as I have become more confident and I believe in them, too.

I tried to upload that vid of us trying to make the songs match up, but blogger won't let me. What a shame. I need to upload all these shitty vids online so that everyone can see how utterly amazing and stupid and awkward we were. Well. Me. But Rachel was involved.

Also, Rachel, are you not going to tell anyone about Liam?
 I'm surprised at you.

Been Awhile....

Well, it certainly has been quite a long time since Kelsey or myself posted. We should be rightly ashamed.

This is false advertising. They summarized the Bible quote! Murderers. It's at least a bazillion words longer.

I've been floundering around trying to keep this blog going (cue obvious failure), yet for all the failure I just can't seem to let go.

Yes that's right, I'll probably be coming here years from now with sporadic bullshit posts that really mean nothing. 

....Because I just can't let the fuck go of this thing. I'm so grabby-handed and needy.

I guess part of me considers this blog a potential great jump towards internet something (poor sap, don't you wish?). Other than that I just really love reading any post Kelsey makes because I'm nosy like that.

Kelsey, you bitch who never posts ever. Ever. Ever. You've totally forsaken the Bucketsphere. For shame love. For shame.

I typed 'Life is not an Excuse' into Google Images. This was my favorite "matching" image.

So I'm barely (read: NOT) keeping this blog going and Ms. Kelsey-fun-pants is for real not helping. That's okay though. I understand her busy life/work schedule now (slave to Sheetz and school). I'm going to buy her fuzzy handcuffs for Christmas. It's the same principle right?

Handcuffs because Kelsey is my LOMLBFFL (pronounced lah-mull-biff-full). Because we kind-of-sort-of get each other sometimes. Because we randomly speak the same words/sentences/phrases at once with no pause. 

Like we read each other or some shit. Fucking metal.

They are the same reasons that lead to us attempting weird shit like trying to match a computer voice to the song 'I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts'. We were determined despite the obvious problem of THE SONG IS FUCKING FASTER THAN A GOD-DAMNED ROBOT VOICE. Eh. It was still funny.

Or how we make up the most stupid inside jokes. Fuck us. We won't remember them in the future. Like I'll be sitting beside Kelsey on my front porch, both of us in rockers and this will be our conversation:

Rachel: Ya'll remember that one time I said 'cock and mupcakes' and we all had a fucking laughing fit?

Kelsey: No, can't say that I do. (*spots rogue children in the yard, stands up, flaps her sexy apron) YA'LL GO ON AND GIT OUTTA HERE! GIT! YA'LL HEAR ME? GIT!

Rachel: What were we talking about again? 

Yes, that will be the life for me. Sexy.

------
So a question...

Am I the only person who flashes their lights to warn of cops?

Because seriously. I speed motherfuckers. Give me a little help.

------
*Kelsey. Kelsey. Kelsey. Kelsey. Kelsey.

That is fucking all group. Dismissed.

Ah, Sweet, Sweet Religion

Hi ya'll! This is Rachel...again!

I believe that once a many moon ago Kelsey posted the rules to our blog. I believe that I have forgotten these rules. I believe.

The only religious official for me.

However, I do remember something about Fridays being 'hot-topic' kind of days. I will disregard this rule considering my previous post was pretty hot in my opinion.

Now with the power of hate. So. Much. Hate.

Yes Kelsey, I'm disregarding your rules. Take that (rewind it back).

This is my story for the day...dun. Dun. Dun!

I believe I have stated in a previous post that I work for a wine importation and distribution company. If not, well I do.

A good representation of how I feel most days.

My official job here is to get wine cleared through customs and into the U.S.A.

Pretty accurate description of 'Merica.

To insure the successful delivery of wine, I collect the necessary paperwork and transfer it to our company's custom broker. I have recently started e-mailing (like a week ago) a new contact at one of our South African wineries. I was not aware that this made us besties. I did not sign up for a South African bestie. 

So today (my real story!) I was going through my daily e-mails and  noticed one titled 'Powerful message'. I immediately cursed our new spam filter, wondering why an obvious chain message was sitting in my inbox as opposed to my blacklist.

Upon opening (ha! Safety!) I realized that this e-mail was from our new contact. It was indeed a chain message considering it had already been passed back and forth by like a thousand-and-one South Africans. 

I could not comprehend why I was copied on this message. Was it an accident? Did this person seriously consider our short work-related e-mail exchanges friendship territory? Why was I copied?!

I became even more befuddled when I opened the attachment (also safety!). 

To be completely honest...WHAT?!

Why was this sent to me? What the fuck?

Now, I'm not bashing religion...but really? How does this help your cause? Is it even right to use God in such a way? Isn't it a sin to blatantly lie with 'Pass this on and God will do good things for you NOW. Anything you ask!!!!'? 

I'm additionally put off by e-mails like this because I am atheist. I hate that people assume I'm a friend of Jesus and send me religious bung all the time. Newsflash Christian parade, not everyone is God's best worshiper. We do not need to hear about the 'Good Word' 24/7. Don't you all complain when we 'evil atheists' try to infringe on your 'rights'? How about a little tolerance from both parties? You can stop beating me with the Bible and I'll stop laughing at the Jesus billboard on the side of the road.

This. This is what it feels like every time a Christian bombards me with Jesus.

I've had Christians tell me to be more tolerant of them as my disbelief is no reason to insinuate there is anything wrong with their religion. Oh really? There is nothing wrong with your religion? You're all flawless to a T?

So the Christian need to invade our government with Christian ideals is not real? The need to fight for mandatory prayer in school or religious class is not real? 

You all aren't fighting a battle to make this country a Theocracy while still insisting that you're the victims and that atheists are ruining our world? Right.

The tolerant Christians of the world. Fucking disgusting.

Or how about the all too famous - "Gays can't get married because God says they can't". Fucking get a fucking clue and realize that your religion does not belong in government. If you'd spend more time worrying about your church attendance and less on shit that doesn't have to do with you, you'd be much better off. You can keep your little bumpkin church ideals and say 'straights only' (nah-nah), while I'll gladly fight for equal marriage rights. 

But oh no. Gays are so bad.

Christians always wonder why atheists are so anti-religion? Well, here you go. Take a good hard look and realize that you're wanting all the rights while denying everyone else. And all because your God apparently says so. 

Good job Christians. Good job. You want 'equality' for yourselves and no one else. Bravo.

Adios questers!